trancejen's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- “I hate that stupid black cat.” “She isn’t stupid!” “Yes she is.” “Gramma, she isn’t stupid.” “Yes, J., you’re right, she isn’t stupid, she’s just mean.” “I don’t care. I hate her, she drives me nuts.” “That’s my itsy wittle baby you’re talking about.” “She’s evil.” “She’s just playing.” “Ollie was just sleeping, and she attacked her for no reason.” “She’s playing. She’s bored. How do you know you wouldn’t do the same thing if you were a fine young cat?” “I wouldn’t.” “You might. I would.” “You would.” “I would. I’d probably guard my litter box, too.” *jumps up, teeth bared* “NO, MOTHER, YOU MAY NOT TAKE A CRAP IN MY BOX, FOR IT IS MINE! AAAAAHAHAHA! NO CRAPPING IN MY BOX!!!” “Jennifer.” “HSSS HSS HSSSS HSSS!!! FIND YOUR OWN BOX IN WHICH TO CRAP!! AAAAHAHAHAHA!” “You’re ridiculous.” “I will bar the bathroom door and smack you upside the head if you dare try to enter the sacred crapping spot. HAHA! HSS HSS HSS!!” “MOMMY!! HA!” “Jennifer.” “AND WHEN YOU SLEEP, I WILL LEAP ON YOUR HEAD, JUST BECAUSE I AM YOUNGER, AND BECAUSE I CAN!! HAHAHAHA!! I WILL JUMP ON YOUR HEAD AND THEN ACT AS IF I DID NOTHING! HAHAHAHA! HSS HSS HSS HSS!!! WOO!” “You need help.” “Later, when you are licking your butt and believe you are alone-“ “-GRAMMA DOESN’T LICK HER BUTT!” “-You don’t know that. When you are engaged in your most private of cleansing acts, I will burst out from under the bed with my hair standing on end, a terrifying spectacle, and chase you from the room so that you will know I am queen of this house!! I AM QUEEN OF THIS HOUSE!! AAAAAHAHAHA!!!” “I thought that medicine was supposed to sedate you.” “Yeah, go figure.” Happy Saturday.
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